Movie Review: ‘The French Italian’

by | Oct 27, 2025 | Featured Post, Movie Reviews, Movies | 0 comments


Greetings again from the darkness. Are you a good person? It’s really not that difficult to determine … although it does require a bit of honest self-reflection. The debut feature film from writer-director Rachel Wolther (co-written with Jesse Millward) is clearly meant to be comical satire, and even more clearly does not include me in the target audience. It seems to me the window for putting whiny, entitled complainers in the spotlight has closed, and these folks are more sad and annoying than funny. Still, since I’m likely in the minority, I’ll strive for objectivity here.

Valerie (Catherine Cohen, DATING & NEW YORK, 2021) and Doug (Aristotle Athari, MOLLI AND MAX IN THE FUTURE, 2023) are thirty-somethings living in New York City in a rent-controlled Brownstone. Their careers are stagnant (his) and borderline non-existent (hers). She doesn’t seem to have a clue about how to take responsibility at work, or even how to fulfill the basic duties. When girlfriend Mary (Chloe Cherry) moves in with usually quiet downstairs neighbor Jordan (Jon Rudnitsky, STEALING PULP FICTION, 2025), she brings along her karaoke machine, and immediately Valerie and Doug are annoyed with the sound pollution and constant “La Bamba”, and begin creating scenarios that might explain their neighbors.

Once they escape to the suburbs, the childish couple began strategizing to get revenge on the old neighbors, and with the help of equally unstable friend Wendy (Ruby McCollister), they decide to take advantage of Mary’s pursuit of acting. Their ‘ingenious’ plan involves putting on a fake play and inviting Mary to audition for the part. The plan makes little sense and ends up drawing in another actor named Joe (Ikechukwu Ufomadu, JUDAS AND THE BLACK MESSIAH, 2021) in what ends up being a quite fortunate move.

While this movie didn’t scratch an itch for me, I certainly appreciate the performances. Ms. Cohen and Mr. Athari nail characters who are impossible to like. Why they decided to relocate and gain revenge without ever bothering to meet the neighbors is quite a statement. Ms. McCollister brings some much needed quirky energy to the proceedings. Ms. Cherry transitioned from years in the adult film industry to more conventional acting with “Euphoria”. Her take on Mary in this film is definitely interesting and unusual. While I appreciated the “Atlas Shrugged” spoof, I found this satire to be less of a comedy and more of a generational snapshot for dummies (like me).

Available on VOD beginning October 28, 2025

David Ferguson
Latest posts by David Ferguson (see all)